Saturday, October 18, 2008

A Writer Who Doesn't Write

Ever since I can remember, I had a real passion for writing. I was editor-in-chief of my high school paper. I majored in Journalism in college. I've just always enjoyed how a series of words could make a person feel anything and everything. I'm still fairly new at this whole blogging business, but I already enjoy it. For me, it fills something in my heart that makes me excited and proud to be writing again. I'm saddened that my inspiration to return to writing was as a result of losing Dylan, but I'm honored to have that story to share. I'm humbled to have people read this. So now, I guess I should share some writing. First, I wrote the following letter to Dylan when we were in the hospital with him:


It's hard for me to not feel cheated or teased by God for taking you from us too soon. I have to think of you as being much too precious and good, too perfect for this world.

We haven't shared nearly enough time together for me to shower you with the love I hold in my heart for you, but I'm sure you'll take that love and more up to Heaven with you.

Please know that your Daddy and I were overjoyed and excited about getting to spend our lives with you. And now we're blessed with the thought that you'll always be watching over us from your perch up above.

You are and will always be our little guardian angel. Thank you for blessing us with the time that you did have for us. I will cherish this time forever.

You get to go to a place where there are no monitors, or tubes, or pumps in your stomach. You get to go to a place free of pain, or worry, or discomfort (even though your pouty face is still so cute)!

I will think of you and Pray for you everyday for the rest of my life, and I know Daddy will too. You are an amazing miracle that I had the blessing and opportunity to hold for the last 9 months.

You're the best thing that's ever happened to us, and nothing's ever going to change that. I hope you know how much you're loved--by Mommy, by Daddy, and by everyone else whose life you've already graced.

As I say to Daddy every single night: "Good night, sweet Prince!" Mommy and Daddy love you very much!

More recently, I wrote this poem to Dylan:

By Katrina
In Memory of Dylan Gabriel

My arms long to hold you
To rock you to your sleep
To bring you close to my heart
And comfort you while you weep

My eyes long to see you
To gaze upon your face
To stare into your perfect eyes
And witness God's good grace

My hands long for your tiny grasp
To let you hold onto me
To show me just how strong you are
And how strong I must be

My lips long to kiss you
To sing you many songs
To read you bedtime stories
And tell you nothing's wrong

My body aches from missing you
And my heart is incomplete
But one day we shall reunite
At Heaven's gate, we'll meet.

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